The Intersection of Emotional Intelligence and Core Competencies

There are two topics I end up in conversation about often because of the work I do. The first is coaching competencies because I’m a mentor coach and love supporting professional coach growth. The second is emotional intelligence and some of the specific scales within emotional intelligence. As a coach, I support my clients in their emotional intelligence growth but also love supporting other coaches around this critical topic.

There are a number of different models for emotional intelligence. Some of them look at four categories, others 15. All of them focus on a variety of skills that help us with self-perception and expression, as well as navigating emotions and relationships with others. This can be around things like decision-making, healthy relationships and managing stress.

As coaches we often learn these tools to support our clients. Today though, let’s apply the brilliance behind the emotional intelligence concepts to our own growth and development in mastering our competencies as coaches.

When maximizing the information that we get from emotional intelligence assessments, we look at specific areas within the broader topics. Contrasting areas that are significantly higher than others can really be beneficial. For example, what if my client’s empathy score is low and their independence is quite high? What might we notice?

How about if flexibility is low and assertiveness is high?

Consider the client who has high stress tolerance and low empathy.

This is a very helpful exercise. It helps us help our client to understand the impact of these differences in their own life and also the lives’ of people around them.

Let’s apply emotional intelligence skills to use as coaches and parallel them to the updated ICF Core Competencies model that our colleagues have brought to us.

Here is the summary of the new model:

1. Foundation
2. Demonstrates Ethical Practice
3. Embodies a Coaching Mindset
4. Co-Creating the Relationship
5. Establishes and Maintains Agreements
6. Cultivates Trust and Safety
7. Maintains Presence
8. Communicating Effectively
9. Listens Actively
10. Evokes Awareness
11. Cultivating Learning and Growth
12. Facilitates Client Growth

Now, let’s bring these concepts together.

How will high empathy help me in my coaching? Which competencies might it impact the most?

Since I can’t hear your brilliant answers (that would be fun!) I’ll share some of my thoughts:

• I’ll be able to use my empathy to feel emotional shifts in my client. It will support me being able to maintain presence, help me in cultivating trust and safety.
• My empathy will help me to listen actively to the emotions and energy changes, not just the words.

You get the idea, I’m sure. Now what if this coach with high empathy is low in assertiveness?

With high empathy and low assertiveness evoking awareness may be a challenge! I may be so impacted by my client’s story and emotion that my lower assertiveness makes it hard to ask the tough questions or reflect back observations that may be uncomfortable for my client.

Let’s look at just the emotional intelligence scale of impulse control. If that is low for a coach, jumping in with interruptions or ideas will be tempting, making “listens actively” tricky, among other things.

So, what are the emotional intelligence scales that are out of balance for you? How could improving certain aspects of emotional intelligence really support your coaching?

Happy growing!